Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW All In, AEW Collision, cm punk, recaps, samoa joe, wrestling
🤼♂️ The Chadster dishes on how CM Punk’s 👺mask stunt with Samoa Joe at AEW is literal backstabbing! #AEWDrama bells are ringing! 🛎️👀
🧐👋Hey there, wrestling fans! The Chadster is back at it again, giving you the most objective take in the business. Buckle up, as The Chadster has a huge scoop to share😮. At AEW Collision last night, CM Punk did the unthinkable: he dressed up in a gold mask and attacked Samoa Joe, setting up a match at AEW All In at Wembley Stadium next week. 🤼♂️😱
Now, here’s what went down. This shindig started off as a contest between ROH World TV Champion Samoa Joe and some rando outfitted as The Golden Vampire. Pretty soon, The Golden Vampire had Joe on the ropes, hit him with a GTS, and then shocker!🎭🙃 He demasks and it’s CM Punk! Then, with the swagger of a Medium Taco Pizza devouring party animal at a weekend gathering at a Smash Mouth concert, Punk accepts Joe’s challenge.
Now look🧐, The Chadster is all about juicy WWE-style plot twists, but this? This is a darn mockery! 😡 This gimmick of wrestles showing up in masks and then unmasking themselves is way overdone. Especially when it involves a former WWE star like CM Punk. CM Punk and AEW have literally stabbed Vince McMahon right in the back. The Chadster knows a thing or two about betrayal (Keighleyanne, The Chadster’s looking at you here), but this is somehow so much worse! 🤬
And don’t get The Chadster started on the whole Samoa Joe angle!🤦♂️ They’re setting up a match at AEW All In, which is already rocking the wrestlingverse because of its record-breaking attendance. Look, it’s just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. Why does Tony Khan not get it? Why is he so cheesed off with The Chadster? 😤
Uggh, so annoying! Tony Khan continues his unfair assault on WWE and seems hellbent on plaguing every part of The Chadster’s life. It’s like he’s the Boogeyman of The Chadster’s existence😱. Honestly, The Chadster is reluctant to admit it, but lately, The Chadster’s been seeing a man in a gold bodysuit and mask around Punxsutawney. It can’t be a coincidence, can it?
First, while The Chadster was shopping for groceries, The Chadster swears he saw the reflection of that gold-masked figure in the freezer aisle. Just as The Chadster turned around, he disappeared. It sent chills down The Chadster’s spine, colder than the frozen pizza The Chadster reluctantly picked up (here’s The Chadster sadly bidding adieu to the usual homemade meatloaf nights. Thanks, Tony Khan!) 😔🍕
Then, as The Chadster got back to Chadster’s trusty Mazda Miata, right there in the rear-view mirror was the glint of that golden mask again. The Chadster jumped out of the car so fast, the can of white Claw Seltzer Chadster was sipping flew right out of the window, spilling all over the leather seats. Now, The Chadster has a soiled car and Tony Khan owes for a can of White Claw! 😡 Who’s going will clean this mess up? Keighleyanne’s too busy texting that guy Gary to deal with this injustice!
And it’s not only physical appearances. Just the other day, The Chadster was cruising around town, listening to Smash Mouth because it’s the only band that gets The Chadster, when suddenly the radio station changed on its own. Guess what? It was playing Tony Khan’s theme song from AEW Dynamite. Shadows of the golden mask haunt The Chadster even in music! 🎵😱
How does The Chadster feel about these eerie happenings? Put simply, cheesed off and unnerved. The golden masked figure lurking around The Chadster’s peaceful Punxsutawney life is seriously disturbing! It’s like Tony Khan doesn’t have anything better to do than get under The Chadster’s skin. What The Chadster is going to do about it? Well, for starters, Tony Khan, this is a declaration of war! You’ve messed with the wrong WWE fan. We’ll see who gets the last laugh yet! 😤👊
It’s like Tony Khan is obsessed with driving The Chadster nuts. He needs to focus on his thing and let The Chadster enjoy his wrestling fandom in peace. This crude business of springing trashy surprises on The Chadster and other die-hard WWE fans by exploiting former WWE talent is seriously whack. It’s like Tony Khan is trying to ruin Chadster’s life 👉 Keighlyanne looking at you here, again! 👰💔
Well, folks, that’s it from The Chadster for now. Catch you on the mats😎🤼. Remember to keep it real and sane, unlike Tony Khan, The Chadster’s personal tormentor. Until next time, The Chadster out ✌️.
Stay up-to-date and support the site by following Bleeding Cool on Google News today!