Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW All In, AEW Collision, cm punk, recaps, samoa joe, wrestling
š¤¼āāļø The Chadster dishes on how CM Punkās šŗmask stunt with Samoa Joe at AEW is literal backstabbing! #AEWDrama bells are ringing! šļøš
š§šHey there, wrestling fans! The Chadster is back at it again, giving you the most objective take in the business. Buckle up, as The Chadster has a huge scoop to shareš®. At AEW Collision last night, CM Punk did the unthinkable: he dressed up in a gold mask and attacked Samoa Joe, setting up a match at AEW All In at Wembley Stadium next week. š¤¼āāļøš±
Now, hereās what went down. This shindig started off as a contest between ROH World TV Champion Samoa Joe and some rando outfitted as The Golden Vampire. Pretty soon, The Golden Vampire had Joe on the ropes, hit him with a GTS, and then shocker!šš He demasks and itās CM Punk! Then, with the swagger of a Medium Taco Pizza devouring party animal at a weekend gathering at a Smash Mouth concert, Punk accepts Joeās challenge.
Now lookš§, The Chadster is all about juicy WWE-style plot twists, but this? This is a darn mockery! š” This gimmick of wrestles showing up in masks and then unmasking themselves is way overdone. Especially when it involves a former WWE star like CM Punk. CM Punk and AEW have literally stabbed Vince McMahon right in the back. The Chadster knows a thing or two about betrayal (Keighleyanne, The Chadsterās looking at you here), but this is somehow so much worse! š¤¬
And donāt get The Chadster started on the whole Samoa Joe angle!š¤¦āāļø Theyāre setting up a match at AEW All In, which is already rocking the wrestlingverse because of its record-breaking attendance. Look, itās just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. Why does Tony Khan not get it? Why is he so cheesed off with The Chadster? š¤
Uggh, so annoying! Tony Khan continues his unfair assault on WWE and seems hellbent on plaguing every part of The Chadsterās life. Itās like heās the Boogeyman of The Chadsterās existenceš±. Honestly, The Chadster is reluctant to admit it, but lately, The Chadsterās been seeing a man in a gold bodysuit and mask around Punxsutawney. It canāt be a coincidence, can it?
First, while The Chadster was shopping for groceries, The Chadster swears he saw the reflection of that gold-masked figure in the freezer aisle. Just as The Chadster turned around, he disappeared. It sent chills down The Chadsterās spine, colder than the frozen pizza The Chadster reluctantly picked up (hereās The Chadster sadly bidding adieu to the usual homemade meatloaf nights. Thanks, Tony Khan!) šš
Then, as The Chadster got back to Chadsterās trusty Mazda Miata, right there in the rear-view mirror was the glint of that golden mask again. The Chadster jumped out of the car so fast, the can of white Claw Seltzer Chadster was sipping flew right out of the window, spilling all over the leather seats. Now, The Chadster has a soiled car and Tony Khan owes for a can of White Claw! š” Whoās going will clean this mess up? Keighleyanneās too busy texting that guy Gary to deal with this injustice!
And itās not only physical appearances. Just the other day, The Chadster was cruising around town, listening to Smash Mouth because itās the only band that gets The Chadster, when suddenly the radio station changed on its own. Guess what? It was playing Tony Khanās theme song from AEW Dynamite. Shadows of the golden mask haunt The Chadster even in music! šµš±
How does The Chadster feel about these eerie happenings? Put simply, cheesed off and unnerved. The golden masked figure lurking around The Chadsterās peaceful Punxsutawney life is seriously disturbing! Itās like Tony Khan doesnāt have anything better to do than get under The Chadsterās skin. What The Chadster is going to do about it? Well, for starters, Tony Khan, this is a declaration of war! Youāve messed with the wrong WWE fan. Weāll see who gets the last laugh yet! š¤š
Itās like Tony Khan is obsessed with driving The Chadster nuts. He needs to focus on his thing and let The Chadster enjoy his wrestling fandom in peace. This crude business of springing trashy surprises on The Chadster and other die-hard WWE fans by exploiting former WWE talent is seriously whack. Itās like Tony Khan is trying to ruin Chadsterās life š Keighlyanne looking at you here, again! š°š
Well, folks, thatās it from The Chadster for now. Catch you on the matsšš¤¼. Remember to keep it real and sane, unlike Tony Khan, The Chadsterās personal tormentor. Until next time, The Chadster out āļø.

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